Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Randomize
