I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
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