i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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