3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
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