no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
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I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
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I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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