All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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