i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Randomize
