Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
