we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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