she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
