I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
