? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Randomize
