you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
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