Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
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does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
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THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
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