normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
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