Rock
Scissors
Fuck
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Randomize
