do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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