It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
Randomize
