I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize