The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
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