forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
Randomize
