Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (630): i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college... http://tfl.nu/0xsv
  Replies (33) Good night (3002) Bad night (717)
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (973): maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game http://tfl.nu/v1t4
  Replies (40) Good night (5259) Bad night (494)
• Favorite

  (347): View more from New York

  I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (347): I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant http://tfl.nu/amxy
  Replies (29) Good night (1176) Bad night (5860)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (402): Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself. http://tfl.nu/fedc
  Replies (23) Good night (5995) Bad night (658)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (443): i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed? http://tfl.nu/sqdz
  Replies (27) Good night (1101) Bad night (5950)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (617): Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear.. http://tfl.nu/yx7i
  Replies (7) Good night (930) Bad night (1960)
• Favorite

  (704): View more from North Carolina

  This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (704): This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'. http://tfl.nu/12fd
  Replies (9) Good night (734) Bad night (2324)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (978): Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat http://tfl.nu/7lwm
  Replies (18) Good night (4337) Bad night (779)
• Favorite

  (828): View more from North Carolina

  I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (828): I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm. http://tfl.nu/jyta
  Replies (19) Good night (732) Bad night (4535)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (610): Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him http://tfl.nu/y954
  Replies (2) Good night (1014) Bad night (519)
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (503): Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them? http://tfl.nu/lznr
  Replies (9) Good night (1294) Bad night (340)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (703): So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this http://tfl.nu/pt0i
  Replies (6) Good night (1053) Bad night (443)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?" http://tfl.nu/z8zt
  Replies (2) Good night (1360) Bad night (295)
• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (805): Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck. http://tfl.nu/zu2d
  Replies (6) Good night (315) Bad night (1666)
• Favorite

  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (262): got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table. http://tfl.nu/5l8a
  Replies (2) Good night (530) Bad night (215)

Randomize