Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize
