I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
