Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
