i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
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