I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Randomize
