new low.... made out with someone while peeing
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
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