pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
Randomize
