Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
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