Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
