Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
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