Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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