Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
