Ketchup is God's man juice
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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