I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
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