I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize