so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize
