he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
