Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
