I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
