If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
I won't apologize to a one balled man
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
