hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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