I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
don't judge my taste in strippers
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
