I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
