I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
