My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
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