You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize