is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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