One girl and one boy is just not enough.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Randomize
