Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Randomize
