i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Randomize
