Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
I'd cum for enchiladas.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
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